Seek Uncomfortable Truth

Written by Pastor Heidi Eickstadt (Sermon on 3/6/2022)

Jesus says today we are set free by the truth but what if that truth is hard? What if that truth is uncomfortable? Nine years ago, I had a conversation that I’ll never forget, a conversation that revealed to me a truth that I am still uncovering about myself, the church and our world.

I was on a trip to Israel/Palestine and a couple of days in to the trip, we were talking about our experiences so far. Our conversation turned to how the situation in the West Bank reminded us of the United States and how Native Americans were forced onto reservations as more and more of their land was taken by the government.

I remember saying something to the effect of, “we can’t do anything about that now in the U.S. but we can still do something here in the West Bank.” I was surprised by their visceral reaction to what I said, especially the black women in the group. I saw the anger and frustration in their eyes, their body language and the way one of them left our conversation fuming. I couldn’t understand why they were so upset by what I said...I kept thinking about it in the hours, days and even months that followed.

It made me extremely uncomfortable that they seemed to take offense at what I said and at first, I was defensive. I wasn’t racist, so why were they acting like what I said was?  But then, after a while, I became less defensive and instead of justifying to myself why I wasn’t a racist and why they were wrong to have such a reaction. I moved through my fear, shame and discomfort to start wondering what I didn’t see, what I didn’t know. Why did my statement cause others so much pain?

What was underlying my perspectives that I wasn’t even aware of but which was unintentionally hurting other people? And as a Christian, called to love my neighbor, what were my blind spots preventing me from loving my neighbor as myself?

I couldn’t let it go, I wanted to know why what I had said caused that reaction.

So a year later, when it was time for me to choose a church to do field education in, so I purposefully chose a church I knew was focusing on racial justice. And my mind was blown open by hearing about the experiences and the stories of people of color, as well as studying history, society and culture from outside a white perspective. I began to see how much I didn’t see in our country and society because I am a white woman who hasn’t experienced the systemic inequality and injustice of the status quo.

I began to hear in my original statement the propensity of white nations, people and even churches to dismiss the harms they’ve caused in the past, to fail to recognize how they’ve been complicit in injustice and to ignore the consequences for the present day. I also realized how quick I had been to condemn injustice in another country and to want to take action and punish them while ignoring similar conditions in my own country. It is easier to point the finger than to admit the unjust laws, policies and culture in my own country of which I have prospered while my neighbor has suffered and been marginalized.

I began to realize that white supremacy isn’t just those people who belong to the KKK, or say racial slurs, or outright say and believe that white people are superior. Hearing the experiences and stories of people of color, I realized that white supremacy is the centering of white people: our stories, our feelings, our perspectives, our well-being, our image, they all are the norm, the center, the measure.

White supremacy is implicit in our systems, our structures, our institutions; even ourselves and our churches. It’s like white supremacy is a pair of blinders on a horse, it keeps us from seeing or hearing the stories and experiences of those on the margins, and most of us wear them and we don’t even realize it.

It was an uncomfortable truth that I had to face about myself and I keep having to face within myself if I am going to follow Jesus.

If Jesus is truly the center of my life, the Way I follow, the God whom I trust, then I have to turn from whiteness being my center. I have to turn away from the things that prevent me from following his central commandment: loving God and loving my neighbor as myself. I have to take off the blinders that keep people of color out of focus, out of sight and out of mind in how I see the world, how I make decisions and how I concretely live out my faith.

As both Jesus and Luther teach us, amongst many others, it is at the margins, among the vulnerable and oppressed, that we find God. God is not found in a position of power and glory but suffering on the cross. And if Jesus is on the margins, and white supremacy creates and perpetuates the margins, then white supremacy separates me not only from my neighbor, but also from God.

Although this journey has been difficult and uncomfortable and has forced me outside my comfort zone, I am grateful, so incredibly grateful, for it. Learning the truth about white supremacy and racism in our history, our systems, our church and myself has been a liberating truth, liberating me from those blinders that make me unknowingly participate and be complicit in harming my neighbor. It is a truth that liberates me from the false idol of a God who reflects only my white-centric perspective, a truth that frees me to be in relationship with THE God of ALL people.

In our Gospel today, Jesus says in the New English Translation: If you continue to follow my teaching, you are really my disciples and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Our Lent of Liberation will reveal to us the truth of the sin of white supremacy and racial injustice that separates us from our neighbor and from God. The testimonies in our devotional, our sermon series, our liturgy, they will give us eyes to see the truth of our sin so we can turn back to God and be freed for relationship with our siblings of color and with God.

The truth will free us to challenge injustice instead of being complicit or even participating in it. The truth frees us for a future together.

Reflecting on this Lenten journey ahead, you may feel like you don’t have the bandwidth for difficult stuff right now. This first week of Lent, we’ve marked Ash Wednesday, a day about mortality and sin, and we’ve talked about carrying our cross and white supremacy; it’s some heavy stuff, I know. But these are the realities of our world and the church is the Body of Christ in the world, not a sanctuary from the world but a sanctuary in the world.

Luther tells us in the “Freedom of a Christian,” essentially that we are freed FOR each other, not FROM each other. And as the Body of Christ, God works in us like in Christ, to overcome sin and the grave, to bring resurrection in the most seemingly life-less and hopeless of situations. As we journey the way of the cross, we know Christ walks with us and that it will bring new life, that dust and ash and sin will never have the last word.

As one of my favorite songs says, “You God make beautiful things out of the dust, You make beautiful things, You make beautiful things out of us.” I invite you to listen to the song here, let it fill you with the courage and hope to walk this journey, face our sin and let God make us and all things new. Amen.